Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

What are the pros and cons of a prospective bride/groom not having any siblings?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

What caused North Korea to go poor when at first it was rich?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

What is the best/cute/funny/playful chat/conversation between brother and sister?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Is Trump a complete idiot?

I actually pay taxes

I can count

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

What Your Sweat Could Reveal About Your Health - CNN

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I can read

What is the impact of being stereotyped as poor on an individual's life? How does it make them feel?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

What is the difference between the terms "Millennials" and "kids"?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Owen Wilson Brings Clever, Funny “Stick” in Under Par - Roger Ebert

I have a reading level above third grade

I see through liars

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Did the Sumerians, Babylonians and, other Mesopotamians create more, influence more and, were more advanced than Egypt?

I don’t buy bullshit

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

From Trader Joe’s to Children’s Hospital, these are the Colorado locations where you could have been exposed to measles - The Denver Post

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Sweden’s Maja Stark wins U.S. Women’s Open for first major championship - NBC Sports

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand how hurricane paths work

Scientists Discover Promising New Alzheimer’s Treatment - SciTechDaily

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

For an unpublished short story writer, what magazines or online publications offer the best chance of being recognized?

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Its year 2041, and president Hunter Biden has ordered every republican who sweared at him to be arrested and shot. I am on my way to the death row listening to the cheer of the Liberal mob chanting death death death. How can I escape?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight